Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Why Doug Cox is smarter than Doc Emmett L Brown:

For those of you unfamiliar with Back To The Future folklore, there was a trilogy, and it was good, even with that idiot, Doc mucking things up...

Anyways, I always thought that Doc Brown was an idiot, with the exception of the flux capacitor which after all, is what makes time travel possible.

It was in Back to The Future III, where Doc really screwed things up and got himself stuck in 1885. I mean he clearly couldn't even figure out how to get the DeLorean up to 88 MPH without any gas... Well, in the movie, they decided to push it with a train... I know right? Totally unrealistic...

Doc, you are an idiot! The answer is simple and it was discovered hundreds of years ago by a guy named Newton, Isaac Newton... maybe you've heard of him. It's called gravity... duh!

It's simple, with the Delorean missing it's fuel injection manifold that YOU blew up trying to make your own gas and without any way of fixing it, the easiest and best solution is to drop the DeLorean. That's right, I said drop the DeLorean. Did I just blow your mind Doc? I bet I did and I didn't need to bust my head open on a toilet to come up with it either!

The speed of terminal velocity for a skydiver is 124 MPH. The hot air balloon was invented in the 18th century, long before Hill Valley was even on the map. 

As I clearly have illustrated above, once you drop the DeLorean, it would quickly reach 88MPH sending Marty AND You back to 1985, where once your parachute deploys, you will safely land and leave the whiny school marm Clara back in 1885 where she belongs.

Your welcome "Doc".

Your friend in time,
Doug A. Cox


Mike Wood said...

A parachute? Really? That wouldn't burn up when traveling through time? Or freeze to a totally solid mass upon re-entry?


Besides, I was thinking he could write another letter to "future Marty" telling him to build a HUGE ramp right in the exact location where the car will be dropped as it re-enters 1985. That, or a big pool of bubble wrap or something.


Doug Cox said...

mike, mike, mike, mike , mike...

If you recall, the delorean was no longered powered by plutonium but rather Mr. Fusion and thus no reason for cold fusion. That's why each time they travel through time after that, there isn't any ice or "fog discharge".

ooooh... burned...

Anyone else?

JeremySaliba said...

well, i never thought that it was the AIR SPEED of the car that had to reach 88mph, but the tire speed- as if there was some sort of reaction that took place right as the tires begin to spin at 88 mph (somehow the tires act as a catalyst, igniting the flux capacitor to initiate time travel, but still needing the 1.21 jigawatts to cpmplete the necessary energy requirements of traveling through time). which is also why i thought the electrical effects also swirl around the tires when it reaches 88 mph. WHATCHA GOT NOW DOUG?!

Doug Cox said...

jeremy, jeremy, jeremy, jeremy, jeremy

The delorean, when hover converted, had no traction and thus no tire movement, which leads to my hypothesis that time travel was not based on RPMs but rather sheer motion and/or movement.

And when they uncovered the Delorean from the mine shaft, it was still a hovered converted car. Doc only affixed white wall tires so that Marty could use the fuel of 1955 to get the delorean to the OBJECT SPEED of 88mph.

And considering that it is ONLY the flux capacitor that makes time travel possible, and that 1.21 jigawatts is archaeic at best in a world with Mr.Fusion, I think your argument for tires acting as catalysts is infantile.

Good Day Sir!


JeremySaliba said...

well well well, you must feel PRIT-TEE pleased with yourself, eh mr. cox?
maybe you are smarter that doc brown. of course, the creators of the movies seemed to plant a seed even for this contingency. it was long suggested in the films that doc brown was "eccentric" at best, with nearly every single invention he created being a complete and utter failure. it was only after the afore mentioned slip and fall on the toilet that doc had inspiration that led to his one and only success.

so while i acquiesce that you may be smarter than doc brown, you're not smarter than the writers. I SAID GOOD DAY!

Mike Wood said...

Here's the biggest flaw in the Hot Air Balloon/Parachute reasoning:

It's kinda gay.

There really isn't much suspence (no pun intended) if everything works so well, and Clara Barton couldn't ride up on a horse at the last minute and profess her love for Doc, and Marty's hoverboard would be rendered useless at such heights, and the Delorean wouldn't be poetically smashed to bits by a train on the tracks in 1985 if it floated safely to a stop upon its return. That would just be kinda... fluffy, ya know?

That's why it wouldn't work - because, aestehtically speaking, it wouldn't "work".


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